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I was drowning in work today-- but I did manage to write something, however tiny!

The original Frasier always had a little dialogue-free scene running over the credits, so my piece will follow the same form. I figure that by the end of the pilot episode, Freddy and David will have come to some accord and attempt to get along, so I figured the tag ought to reflect that. It's just a little thing, but I think it's cute and hopefully kind of funny.

TAG:

As the credits roll, Freddy and David amuse themselves from the couch by trying to toss hats onto Brody’s head. Finally, Freddy gets up and fetches the mortarboard from his Harvard graduation. Tossing it like a Frisbee, he expertly lands in between the bear’s ears. David cheers and holds up his arms in the “it’s good!” sign.
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I don't know where this came from all of a sudden. It's not exactly seasonally-appropriate. But a little Hawking scene popped into my head tonight, and I scribbled it down in a few minutes just for amusement's sake. It's probably never going to fit into any of the plays, but it was an opportunity for some cute character moments, and one really fun line. It's nice to see them just in a low-stakes character moment that's purely fun and sweet, rather than all mired in drama.

It made me smile; I hope it does you too. 😁

Three Ships, a Mrs. Hawking scene )
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Yep, still pushing on with this! I have completely outlined the scenes of my Frasier spinoff pilot, and there's only a few more to go before I have a complete draft.

I still haven't come up with a better idea for what brings David and Alice to Boston at the same time other than he followed her there because of a stupid adolescent crush. I'm not in love with it, but I haven't been able to think of an idea that is a sufficiently offensive ulterior motive for David that doesn't make it a coincidence that they're both there. I just have to do my best to take him to task for being inappropriate, and not making Alice responsible for him after he violated her boundaries.

This scene would take place two scenes after "Grow Up," where Freddy discovers this. Between them there would be a confrontation between Freddy and David, where he takes David to task for his behavior. David will acknowledge his screw up, but also give insight into his struggle of never fitting into his family and how Freddy's just like their dads, so of course he doesn't understand. This scene is Freddy and Alice, where he gets her perspective and she tells him to take charge of David, since he needs somebody to be there for him and it can't be her.

This should probably have more jokes in it. It's a mostly serious scene, but still it should be funnier in some places.

Scene 2.3 - Stranger in His Own House )
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I powered through and finished! EARLY too, the earliest I've ever finished the 31P31D challenge, but I had the time and I wanted to knock it out.

This last one deals with an idea I'm surprised I've never noodled with before. One little character bit in the Hawking stories that I enjoy is the fact that Clara and Nathaniel met through Nathaniel's older brother Justin, because Clara dated Justin before she and Nathaniel got together. Their mild romantic history is alluded to in Base Instruments; it was Bernie's idea and he pushed to include it. Basically, as they are the same age (three years older than Nathaniel) they came out in the same year, and so met while attending the same parties. They courted for a little while, until Clara got fed up with his interest in other girls and broke it off. She and Nathaniel got together gradually after that.

This little scene is from five or so years before the first Mrs. Hawking play, and depicts how their relationship began to change into something that would lead to falling in love, getting married, and having a couple of babies.

I FINISHED THE CHALLENGE! FOR THE FIFTH YEAR IN A ROW! WOOOOOOO!

Day #31 - True Gentleman )
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Here I go again, banging out important, high-emotion moments from stories that I can't fully picture in too short a period of time. That is a recipe for wasting them. But I just want to finish 31P31D 2016 at this point, and I'm so close, so I'm just going with any idea I think I can reasonably attempt.

This is probably the last scene of Mrs. Hawking part 6, or thereabouts. Mary has just informed Mrs. Hawking and Nathaniel that she's parting ways, and Nathaniel doesn't take the news well. Especially given it's all Mrs. Hawking's fault.

ONE DAY LEFT.

Day #30 - Alone )
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A brief moment from the seventh Mrs. Hawking story. It takes place two years after Mrs. Hawking and Mary have a fight that makes them go their separate ways. Here Mary returns to London on a case, and she runs into Mrs. Hawking totally by surprise when she's working the same case. Their reunion is not what Mary would have hoped.

Again, this scene is kind of abrupt and cursory, but I'm just pushing to finish. TWO DAYS TO GO!

Day #29 - After Two Years )
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I hate how this turned out. It was written too fast and without the planning that it needs. It's an important scene from Mrs. Hawking part four, but it messes all the important parts up.

In the flashback to Mrs. Hawking's youth in the Asian colonies, I want there to be some injustice happening there for her to want to deal with. But I need to be careful about what it is, as I'm telling a colonial story and I don't want my white protagonist to be some Mighty Whitey standing up for native people who are used as a faceless or token plot device. I haven't done enough research to figure out how to deal with that yet. So there's some vague "problem" in this scene alluded to, but I don't know what it is yet so it's non-specific and totally meaningless.

The second problem is, I want an element of this story to be how the young Reginald Hawking has just established a reputation as the hero of the Indian Rebellion. But anytime somebody brings it up, he tries to avoid having to talk about it-- implying without coming out and saying it that he is uncomfortable with what he did there and would prefer not to dwell on how they treated him like a hero for doing something awful. In this, it makes it way too blatant, taking out the speculation as to what he's feeling. I did it completely inelegantly, so it'll have to be completely rewritten.

This will ALL have to be rewritten. Bah. But I'm almost done with 31P31D 2016, so I've just got to fill the quota.

Day #28 - Loyal Servant of the Empire )
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Ugh. So here's the problem with this scene. It's another for the Fraiser spinoff pilot, but it uses an idea I'm not sure I want to include.

I really want to have Freddy believe that David came to him in need, which create a sense of responsibility to his cousin that he latches onto for emotional validation. The idea that he has something to offer a desperate David makes him feel good. But then I want it to turn out that David's actually just using him for something else, which makes Freddy feel betrayed. It will temporarily cause him to withdraw his support out of hurt, but realizing that David's immaturity makes him need Freddy's guidance more than ever leads him back to actually be there for his cousin. That will create a real basis for their relationship-- David needs to learn from and rely on Freddy, and Freddy is taken outside his unhappy self-obsession by taking care of someone else. That idea is super solid and I want to use it.

Additionally, I want to include Alice Doyle in the cast. The trouble there is I'm not sure how. She'd need to turn up in Boston for some reason, and be hooked into the plot somehow, but I was concerned how to do that in a way that wasn't too coincidental with how David happened to arrive in Boston at the same time, after the two of them grew up in Seattle. She's also six years older, which puts her at a slightly different place in life than either Freddy or David.

So where I'm tripping is, what should David's true motivation be? And how does Alice factor in? Unfortunately, at the moment, the only thing I can think of to make these work are to have Alice arrive in Boston for grad school and David, who was believed he was in love with her since he was a kid, decided to come to Boston after his Yale suspension to try to keep pursuing her. She has rejected him in the past and continues to, intending to go on with her own life.

The advantage of this is that it folds her into the story in a sensible way, taking away some of the coincidence. It's a solid ulterior motive for David moving in with Freddy, and one likely to make Freddy feel used and offended. It also makes the need to honor her feelings and develop a relationship with her based in friendship and respect part of David's growing up process.

The problem, however, is that it's a little stale to motivate one of my two primary leads with a disappointed crush on a woman. Despite my intention for her to be one of the main cast and a fully-rounded character in her own right, it brings Alice into things initially as a plot device. I hate doing that to a female character.

I might be able to make it work in a way that wasn't reductive. Maybe if I show that the POINT is that she's her own person and that David is making a mistake in how his crush on her makes him ignore her own agency. It might be okay then. But I'm not sure.

I'd love to think of some other way to make these ideas work, but at the moment I don't have anything else. So I took a crack at it with this scene. It would fall directly after Day #20 - "Reaching Out" in the scene order.

If I did use this, though, it would mean that the whole first half of the pilot was drafted.

Day #27 - Grow Up )
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A very rough, very unmoored scene coming from imagining for the Adonis sequels. I am very interested in exploring this idea that Pavilla, one of the villain characters, represents the damage caused by entitlement and dehumanizing other people, through giving her an obsession with Aidan. I'm trying to figure out how to create interaction between the two of them. I'm a little torn as to how it comes about. Bernie thinks she shouldn't encounter him until she gets captured temporarily in a skirmish early in the second film. I have a been in my bonnet that they have a previous history, but he's got me afraid that's too coincidental. I don't know. I should probably sketch scenes out for both possibilities and just see which I like better. I have a hard time making myself work on something I'm afraid I won't be able to use at all though.

Day #26 - A Small Thing )
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This piece is a little monologue from a point that honestly probably would happen BETWEEN Hawking plays-- part six and part seven, I think. It came from the idea that Nathaniel would be asked to give a toast at Mary's wedding, which happens between those two installments.

The idea here is that Mrs. Hawking and Mary have just had their break, where Mary decides she can't stay and deal with Mrs. Hawking's erratic, dangerous behavior and unfair treatment anymore and goes off with Arthur to America. But first they get married, and when Mrs. Hawking is invited to the wedding as a gesture of good will, she turns it down and does not attend. Both Nathaniel and Mary are very hurt by this and the whole business is very fresh, so I thought it would show up in the speech. And of course, Nathaniel would have to allude to everything he knows about Mary from their work together without stating it outright, as the rest of the guests wouldn't necessarily be aware.

Day #25 - Wedding Toast )
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This scene piece for my Frasier spinoff pilot feels particularly not cohesive. It's got lots of good ideas and the beginnings of funny jokes, but it doesn't have the right rhythm or flow yet. It's designed to set up Freddy a little as a snarky, lonely person who feels a bit trapped in his life, but it doesn't completely demonstrate that. Still, I think with editing it could be made to work nicely. It also would be the first scene featuring Leah Keoh, a fellow adjunct that Freddy works with, tentatively filling in the Roz role. I wrote about her already in Day #20 - Reaching Out.

This would be the first part of the scene that is finished off with the piece from Day #4 - The Cousins Crane. As I mentioned before Day #22 - Men of the Ivies, I'd want to edit the second part of this so that David had not yet told Niles that he was suspended, and that he wasn't sure whether or not he'd be going back to Yale after an attempt was made to straighten things out. I haven't made those edits yet, but I will when I start assembling the pilot from the scenes.

Day #24 - Grading Circle of Hell )
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And the completion of the scene where David moves into Freddy's apartment in my Frasier spinoff pilot! This is the last piece, after part one in Day #19 - Lucky Bear and yesterday's part two, Day #22 - Men of the Ivies. The parts probably could probably be a little more unified, but I like the overall direction. It does a good job of setting up the problem between Freddy and David, I think.

Day #23 - Hanging )
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Another Frasier spinoff scene! This is the next part of the scene started in Day #19 - Lucky Bear, picking up directly where that one left off.

I've decided that, despite what I established in Day #14 - The Cousins Crane, it would be better if when David comes to Freddy with his problem initially, he simply been suspended from Yale rather than expelled, and hasn't told Niles. That will permit it to be a question of whether or not he's going to go back, and telling Niles can be a hurdle he'll have to take in the course of the episode. When I put a full draft of the pilot together, I'll go back and edit that, but for now I'm just continuing with the scenes making that new assumption.

As a side note, [livejournal.com profile] londo has been very helpful in encouraging me to work on this and clarifying my thinking on it. He is a Frasier fan and a very funny guy, so I'm glad to have his perspective.

My jokes will definitely improve with editing!

Day #22 - Men of the Ivies )
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So earlier this week, I got a very encouraging email from my producer contact! Bernie and I sent her our Hood pilot at the beginning of the month, and she read it right away and gave a very positive response! She not only really likes it, she thinks it has potential in the current market. I am ridiculously pleased, as our effort was to create something solid that was specifically commercial, and it looks like she thinks we succeeded. I am particularly encouraged by the fact that she told us she's sharing it around with colleagues; the more eyes on it, the more people can get behind it.

She asked us to write a show bible for it as our next step. That's our next important project, with the intention of getting it to her in the next two weeks. That means I'll be prioritizing that over scene generation until it's finished, so I may not have time to focus on new scenes. Of course I'll still be writing, so I'll just post Hood scenes that were an equivalent amount of work in its place.

Like today, I have focused myself on getting a good start into the bible. So I'm posting this scene of Robin and John from around the midpoint of the story. It takes place after all the Hood scenes posted up to this point except for Day #3 - Rich Boy Out of Water, which it comes a little bit before.

Day #21 - Run )
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Another scene from my Frasier spinoff idea. Needs to be funnier, but I'm rushing to catch up and just posting whatever I can bang out.

This occurs after previous scenes Day #15 - "Subtle but Unmistakeable Disappointment", Day #14 - The Cousins Crane, and Day #19 - Lucky Bear.

Day #20 - Reaching Out )
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A scene from the pilot of my theoretical Frasier spinoff. This scene would of course occur after the opening scene from Day #15 - "Subtle but Unmistakeable Disappointment", probably directly after Freddy agrees to let David move in, in Day #14 - The Cousins Crane.

This is only the first section of what would probably be a multi-part scene. I outlined the whole thing and found it would have several discrete sections, so decided to pause at the first complete part. It introduces something I was musing on including, an element that served the same function as Martin's chair, but translated for the new characters and situation.

As with all these, they need to be punched up so that they're as funny as possible. But it's a start.

image.jpeg


Day #19 - Lucky Bear )
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I spent the day planning a piece, which is definitely necessary writing work, but it did not result in anything postable. So I'm posting another Hood scene to stand in. This occurs directly after Day #7 - Let the Grown Ups Handle It.

Also, I got encouraging news about the Hood pilot yesterday, so this is in a way to celebrate that. More on this later!

Day #18 - He'll Show Them )
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For Mrs. Hawking part 4, a big part of it is going to be revealing more about the relationship between Mrs. Hawking and the Colonel. Most of it is going to be seeing their interactions in the past in flashback form. But I also want to have a little bit in the present-- a rare moment where Mrs. Hawking talked about him in different manner than her usual anger and resentment. Her feelings are complicated, but she's usually so mad at him that she doesn't like to think about him with any nuance, much less discuss him that way.

I don't really know what the plot of part 4 is going to be. But I needed a set up for this scene, so I wrote it on the assumption that the client discovers, in the course of her case, that some bad decision her husband made brought about the death of her child-- which I guess would be the focus of the case itself. I don't know if I actually want to go for that, but it was a convenient assumption for this moment.

Something I want to establish is that, other than when using his full name, she never refers to him as "Reginald"-- only "the Colonel." So when she does it here, it's meant to be striking and meaningful.

Day #17 - Reginald Managed It )
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Today's piece is drawn from my ideas for Mrs. Hawking part 6, the one where I plan on dealing with the Ripper murders. One of the questions I'm going to have to answer about that piece is how to personify the client in that case. An obvious opportunity is to have London prosititutes bring the case to Mrs. Hawking out of fear of the monster that's been hunting them. I like the idea of how they are literally the most tossed-aside and abused women in this society, and should theoretically be the most in need of someone like Mrs. Hawking, but they force our heroes to confront their prejudices and notions of what's considered "decent" in order to stand up for these people.

One option I might take is to use canonical victims as the clients. The result of that is that even if our heroes are successful in catching the killer, they are unable to save the people they set out to save, which gives a sense of tragedy that would be useful to the story I want to tell. Another option is to make the client an original character, so I can be freer about that character's fate without history to nail it down. A third option, and the one I'm currently leaning towards, is to have a pair of women come to ask Mrs. Hawking and company for help, and have one be a historical victim and one be an original character, to give me the possibility of their fates diverging-- one is lost and one is saved, perhaps.

This is scene incorporates some events of the historical murders in order to involve our heroes in the events. Spoilers to follow, I guess, but since the Ripper murders are a matter of historical fact, you probably shouldn't be surprised by some of this.

Day #16 - From a Bloody Nightmare )
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This is totally banged out. I was working on other things today so I didn't really spend a lot of time on it. It's not refined in any way or nearly funny enough. But this is another scene for that (pointless) theoretical Frasier spin-off I was musing on. It would probably come before Day #14 - The Cousins Crane, as it sets Freddy up to find something to take him out of himself, rather than stewing constantly on his dissatisfactions.



Funny, it's the second TV show pilot scribbling I've done that involved the main character talking to a therapist. It's also the device I use for the opening scene of Bridesmaids, as in the first half Day #9 - Nothing Common and the second half Day #13 - About Me. It's a pretty convenient way to have them talk about their life and situation.

Day #15 - Subtle But Unmistakeable Disappointment )

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