Those businesses into which I'm sticking my nose...

Some things I managed to do this afternoon and evening:

Small breakdown after school. Missed a bunch of the all-district department meeting. I am _assured_ by my work bestie that I missed absolutely nothing, which is at least a little reassuring.

(It's been a hard couple weeks at work. I would like it if I felt that my bosses were on my team and trying to support me and mine. I would settle if they were at least able to proactively say "I recognize how hard this latest bullshit is to deal with, and appreciate that you're doing so")

Talked to work bestie for an hour. That was nice. Good discussion of art, of dreams, of movie-making of the value of the act of doing things as different from the value of those things existing later. Clayton is really fucking smart and I'm very happy to be friends with him and get to consume his perspective on things.

When he went off to make copies, I managed to persuade my brain that things would be better if I just did a bare-minimum todo list and fucked off home. Managed to leave the building by like 5:45, which is pretty damn good for "didn't start prep until after 5". Meant I biked home before the sun went down which was good.

Got home and had a Power Hour. Ate dinner. Had a more different second power hour. Forest successfully gamified me by being all "~ooo~ look at the special tree that you can only earn if you do 300 minutes of focused time between now and like five days from now" and having it actually be a very pretty tree. So I'm gonna try for that, which means lots of Power Hours in the next few days. That is...that is not a bad thing.

Some stuff I managed during POWER HOURS:

*Desk is cleaned off, like fully, which I think has not been true since like...well? before my surgery? I could actually _use the computer at my desk_ which is astonishing. We'll see how long it lasts.

*Unpacked from MD trip, got all the laundry downstairs, third load is in the washer now, first load is put away *and* it was the one that had the most hangy-laundry, jegus fuck, I'm proud of myself for that.

*Dishfairy. Nothing special there.

*Went out to the garage and learned I don't seem to own a protractor, which, uh, is throwing a wrench into at least one project I should be working on right now. That's fine, I'll swipe one from work, but also what the fuck.

*Also found a thing in the garage and did a thing in my room and am feeling quite a lot of feelings about it, so we're not gonna talk about that one more until I actually decide what to do with them. Practice being bad at things, probably. Engage with the act of doing things for the sake of the act rather than the sake of the things. All of that is fine, but I wish it didn't come with a side of a very particular insecurity/inadequacy that I fully recognize and I *think* is the same thing that made me write the shittiest LJ post I ever wrote on purpose (like sixteen years ago, apparently. It's less bad than it could be but also jegus _fuck_ Sor, you were goin' through it weren't you?)

It is very funny how "not gonna talk about that one" actually manifests, isn't it? ANYways, I think this might be the first time I've ever specifically tagged _exactly that feeling_ as _oh it goes with those moments_.

*Also I apparently have three separate versions of Vienna Teng's "The Tower", one of which I'd never listened to before (to be fair, it's from her live concert album Moment Always Vanishing, and I only quite recently obtained that one). The 2001 version showed up in shuffle and I said "yeah, that seems good to listen to" and _really_ liked some of the differences in musicality. And then I did the live Vienna/Alex Wong version and _holy shit_.

I got not quite halfway through before Gabriel _grabbed_ me and pushed me onto the dance floor. There are advantages to actually cleaning my room, having space to dance is one of the biggest. He and I danced to that one, and then I wrapped with the regular version and let Alis take her turn with me. It was really fucking good for me. Dancing is _really_ fucking good for me.

It's a good reminder that sometimes we can be our own love with intuition.

Hopefully tomorrow will also be good? That would be nice.

~Sor
MOOP!

Today I went to the Renaissance faire!

Yes, this means MD faire, _obviously_. I should maybe try out King Richard's again sometime, since I'm running on decade+ old memories, but honestly, nothing I've heard about it since has implied that I actually should try it out. So if I want to go to a rennfaire it means I pack a bag and get on the train and head down to Maryland!

I went with my mom, and my partner Tuesday, and also Tuesday's mom and sibling and sibling's-partner. We saw some shows! We ate some food off of sticks! I bought some pretty shiny things! It was a good time!

I have forgotten that I pretty deeply hate attending jousts, which is a shame. I enjoy the part where there are impressive feats of horsemanship. I really _really_ do not like the part where we are baying for the death of the competitors. Stage combat is neat and fun to watch from a technical and talent perspective! It feels...it feels pretty uncomfortable to be in the stands surrounded by people who do not seem to be appreciating this aspect of it and instead just want violence.

Also very loud and overstimulating. I would enjoy more being much further onto the edges of the crowd.

I was very happy to get a new coin necklace, and was excited by more designs than would fit on one coin, which feels hopeful for the future. I own five of them now! And also one of the new designs this year was _spider_ which feels amazing prescient for a year in which I'm increasingly using these as The One Official Jewelry I Wear Like From A Spellcraft And Ritual Perspective. Good to have a spider included!

I also bought matching fidget rings for me and Tuesday, because they're quite lovely. And two pairs of hairsticks! One set from Kathleen (although she herself wasn't present) at least in part as a reminder to go buy a bunch more from her through the internet. The other set is really nice maile flowers that I quite liked and obtained from a place near the jousting field. It's possible I shouldn't be left unsupervised for too long at faire, or I will find nice things to use to put up my hair :3

And the weather was perfect to wander around! Sitting was good, standing was good, there was nice breeze so I wasn't ever overdressed but I also wasn't chilly -I brought my gloves and didn't need them, and decided at the last minute to leave the midlevel cloak in the car (I wore the lightlevel and didn't even consider the heavy one)

We watched the Skum perform Othello, which was especially interesting because I don't actually know that one --got a much better idea now though! And later we watched Hilby the Skinny German Juggle Boy, who Tuesday and I saw when we came to faire together two years ago. He remains _extremely_ funny. I also saw a few swords get swallowed, and quite enjoyed some Piper Jones from afar.

And I stopped and had a nice conversation with Miss Nancy, and we saw Pepto in passing (with an amazing viking ship wagon for her kids), and I chatted a bit with the Beef Jerky Guy.

So it was overall very good! I am pleased to be home now though, which is to say, at Cameron and Jake's place in Bal'mer. Tonight I need to finish some sub plan stuff, so that tomorrow I get to stress-free ride a train back home. (I do like riding a train, except when they have two hour delays that start late enough that mom already kicked her friends out and started driving to the station to pick me up. Looking at you, way down.)

I hope your life is also good.

~Sor
MOOP!