31 Plays in 31 Days, #10 - “Houses and Humans”

[breakinglight11]

Okay, this is an idea I really like. Monster High released a doll of Twyla where she’s the DM for a roleplaying game with the accompanying dice and minifigures, and it made me think it would be really fun to write Little Monsters skits where they play their equivalent of Dungeons and Dragons. But since they’re monsters, they play as boring humans doing weird versions of human shit. Hilarious!

This bit is pretty random and thrown together, but I like the gag. It also occurred to me that I could buy, like, regular-looking Barbie dolls and stage their interactions to represent the in-game events, cutting between them and the “real” monster world. OH JOY MORE DOLLS TO BUY AND STORE. But it could be cool.



Day #10 - “Houses and Humans”
From Little Monsters
By Phoebe Roberts

TWYLA BOOGIEMAN, a boogie girl
FRANKIE STEIN, a Frankenstein enby
VENUS MCFLYTRAP, a plant monster girl
HEATH BURNS, a fire imp boy
GHOULIA YELPS, a zombie girl
~~~

(TWYLA, HEATH, FRANKIE, VENUS, and GHOULIA huddle around a battle mat and labor over their character sheets.)

TWYLA: All right, players. Everybody finished building their characters? Okay, let’s see who we’ve got.

HEATH: I’ll be playing Tedward Manningham III. His class is Chad, with a specialization in Party Boy. As he walks the treacherous path of the crypto bro, it’s just a matter of time until his bitcoins explode and he can level up to True Baller.

FRANKIE: I’ll be Linda from Finance! She’s an Office Drone hoping to earn enough experience points to multi class into Stay at Home Mom! Her enemies tremble at the sound of her minivan approaching, because they all know she’s a kickass boss babe whose kids come first!

VENUS: This is Esmeralda Tangerina Wigglesworth. She is an Influencer from the Glamazon clan, roaming the wastes seeking vengeance for her failed BBL. Her signature weapon— eyeliner sharp enough to kill a man. Her signature coffee order— too complicated to be made right on the first try.

GHOULIA: (explanatory zombie sounds)

FRANKIE: Wow. Bunny’s got some sympathetic backstory. I love the part with the prison break.

VENUS: Me too. And I hope the jilted fiancé comes back.

HEATH: But do you really think the special forces training is worth the constitution penalty from the war wounds?

GHOULIA: (nuanced zombie sounds)

FRANKIE: Excellent point. There are some really compelling narrative hooks embedded in that trade off.

TWYLA: Leave that part to me. Now let’s get down to it. The name of the game— Houses and Humans. Tedward, Linda, Esmeralda, Bunny— roll for initiative!