Odd situation

 So I find myself in an odd situation. I will be in Comedy of Errors with a young man I've had trouble with in the past. I'm at a much better place with him now than I ever have been. He apologized and I accept his apology. I don't think it's healthy for me to try to become friends with him, he makes me think and remember things I don't want to think of, but I've reached a point where to be around him no longer pains me. I'm completely comfortable working and interacting with him, and I've made it very clear to Sheena that he absolutely must not direct around me. I honestly do forgive him. 

The only problem is I don't yet know how to just be normal around him-- quite possibly, now that I think of it, because our interactions have never been normal --and treat him like any other person. My instinct is to ignore him. My eye skips right over him. The real problem with this is that everybody started to do that. At callbacks this past week he would be consistantly ignored by pretty much everyone present, and from what I heard from Alex, it was really starting to bother him. Alex said he didn't know if people were just inclined to do it, or if maybe they were doing it because of what they'd heard from me. And I don't want that. I feel terrible if I've done anything to make it so that people treat him in a way that hurts him. Because I don't want to hurt him. It's wrong, and I don't want it to go on. It may be giving myself too much power to think that I have any responsibility here, but if I did in fact have any influence on this, I need to do something to change it. I need to be kind to him.

I talked to Jared about this, and he offered to take the point and extend the kindness so I wouldn't have to, in hopes that others would follow his lead. That would probably work, a lot of people in this group look up to Jared, and it is very kind of him, but I don't think I can let him make things right for me. I need to take the positive steps myself and treat this guy like a human being.

It's not enough that I don't hate him anymore. I need to really and truly forgive him. So I have to do my best to be kind. It's against my natural inclination at this point, but it's what I need to do.