I think a lot of what you're talking about here has to do with the person, and what they're attracted to overall. I also think a lot of it has to do with what kind of beauty we're trained to look for.
One thing I've noticed, for instance, is how much effort a lot of guys put into looking like they haven't put any effort into their apearance. The perfectly messy hair, the plain t-shirts with a button-up just thrown on... and a good amount of women seem to find that attractive. But we also know just how much effort their effortless appearance took, and people are usually attracted to people who put effort into their appearance.
Or, on a similar vein, you mentioned Chris Evans. (Which, by the way, I totally understand. I have a giant Captain America poster up in my room right now, and more than once I have stopped to just look at him for a moment... and I didn't love the Captain America movie as much as you did. And I haven't even been in my room for a whole day yet. ^_^;; ) More specifically, you mentioned how he had his chest waxed for the Captain America role. There are enough guys who don't have that much body hair that you didn't really think about it when you saw him shirtless, but you still appreciated the effect. Regardless of how much we may notice it, women seem to be attracted to men who take good care of themselves... even if it's not always obvious how much they do so.
And I would argue that men put a fair amount of effort into how they look on a daily basis. They put it into not looking like they put any effort into it, and we can't always tell, but I think that guys do try for pretty just like girls do... girls just tend to obsess over it more.
Finally, I think that peoples' attraction to pretty has to do with the person who is being attracted. There's the cliched phrase - beauty is in the eye of the beholder - but it's only part of my point. How concerned you are with other people being pretty will tend to be universal. I'm drawing almost entirely on my own experience for this point, so I don't know how valid it will be but... may as well make it anyway, just to throw it out there, amirite? As someone who is attracted to both sexes, I usually tend to look for the same level of self-care in men and women. You will not see me going for the rugged, haven't-shaved-in-a-week kind of guys... but, at the same time, I don't tend to like girls who don't wear at least a touch of makeup, or who don't really do anything with their hair, either. I'm attracted to guys like Matt Smith and David Tennant (...my apologies for my giant Doctor Who kick right now seeping into everything) who actually do things with their hair, and wear suits... and make sure that they have bodies that will look especially good in them, too. On the other end of the spectrum, I'm attracted to women like Keira Knightly and Olivia Wilde, both of whom wear some makeup - not a ton, but enough to clearly enhance their natural, exquisite beauty - and take care of their bodies so they have excellent figures. It's the same level of self-care. Now, obviously, not everyone is into both genders as I am, so this isn't exactly applicable to everybody. However, I feel like the same general rule can apply. You're into guys, but you like guys like Chris Evans, who take care of their body hair, and work out so they have incredible physique. But, at the same time, you also appreciate women who have good style and take care of themselves as you do.
I don't really have a feminist filter to look at all of this through... I'm just saying, perhaps it's not a women thing, but just a person thing?
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An equally disjointed and strong point-less response!
Date: 2011-08-31 05:46 pm (UTC)One thing I've noticed, for instance, is how much effort a lot of guys put into looking like they haven't put any effort into their apearance. The perfectly messy hair, the plain t-shirts with a button-up just thrown on... and a good amount of women seem to find that attractive. But we also know just how much effort their effortless appearance took, and people are usually attracted to people who put effort into their appearance.
Or, on a similar vein, you mentioned Chris Evans. (Which, by the way, I totally understand. I have a giant Captain America poster up in my room right now, and more than once I have stopped to just look at him for a moment... and I didn't love the Captain America movie as much as you did. And I haven't even been in my room for a whole day yet. ^_^;; ) More specifically, you mentioned how he had his chest waxed for the Captain America role. There are enough guys who don't have that much body hair that you didn't really think about it when you saw him shirtless, but you still appreciated the effect. Regardless of how much we may notice it, women seem to be attracted to men who take good care of themselves... even if it's not always obvious how much they do so.
And I would argue that men put a fair amount of effort into how they look on a daily basis. They put it into not looking like they put any effort into it, and we can't always tell, but I think that guys do try for pretty just like girls do... girls just tend to obsess over it more.
Finally, I think that peoples' attraction to pretty has to do with the person who is being attracted. There's the cliched phrase - beauty is in the eye of the beholder - but it's only part of my point. How concerned you are with other people being pretty will tend to be universal. I'm drawing almost entirely on my own experience for this point, so I don't know how valid it will be but... may as well make it anyway, just to throw it out there, amirite? As someone who is attracted to both sexes, I usually tend to look for the same level of self-care in men and women. You will not see me going for the rugged, haven't-shaved-in-a-week kind of guys... but, at the same time, I don't tend to like girls who don't wear at least a touch of makeup, or who don't really do anything with their hair, either. I'm attracted to guys like Matt Smith and David Tennant (...my apologies for my giant Doctor Who kick right now seeping into everything) who actually do things with their hair, and wear suits... and make sure that they have bodies that will look especially good in them, too. On the other end of the spectrum, I'm attracted to women like Keira Knightly and Olivia Wilde, both of whom wear some makeup - not a ton, but enough to clearly enhance their natural, exquisite beauty - and take care of their bodies so they have excellent figures. It's the same level of self-care. Now, obviously, not everyone is into both genders as I am, so this isn't exactly applicable to everybody. However, I feel like the same general rule can apply. You're into guys, but you like guys like Chris Evans, who take care of their body hair, and work out so they have incredible physique. But, at the same time, you also appreciate women who have good style and take care of themselves as you do.
I don't really have a feminist filter to look at all of this through... I'm just saying, perhaps it's not a women thing, but just a person thing?