31 Plays in 31 Days, #8 - "The Bobsled"

[breakinglight11]

Another chunk for the Cabin Pressure fan fiction idea I've had! If I've got to write something every day, why not work on the fan fic as long as I'm thinking about it?

This piece happens after "#5 Meet Trudy and Cliff" and again shoots for the series's wit and humor. Though honestly I may have taken it in a slightly more vulgar direction than the original ever really goes, but I think it's still within tone. There's also one Douglas joke in here that's just so Douglas I could imagine John Finnemore himself writing it. Guess which one it is! :-)

For reference, the "petanque team" and "bobsled" are references to a joke from a episode where the characters liken the number of people they've dated to how many players a given athletic endeavor requires. :-)

The Bobsled
by Phoebe Roberts

DOUGLAS RICHARDSON, the first officer for MJN Air
MARTIN CRIEFF, the captain for MJN Air
CAROLYN KNAPP-SHAPPEY, CEO of MJN Air
~~~

DOUGLAS: What's got you so on edge?

MARTIN: I don't want to talk about it.

DOUGLAS: Oh, come on. It's either have a chat, or listen to Tiff and Snooty tear into one another back there.

MARTIN: Well, if you must know... it's that Theresa and I, well, we've got a date coming up.

DOUGLAS: I thought things were going swimmingly. Against all sensible odds.

MARTIN: They are! It's only that... it's not so much a date. It's a trip she wants to go on. An overnight trip.

DOUGLAS: Why, Martin-- do you mean--

MARTIN: (Sigh) Yes!

DOUGLAS: Oh-ho! Time's come to storm the princess's battlements, eh?

MARTIN: Douglas! That's disgusting!

DOUGLAS: Do you at least take the hat off for that? Or does she like you to keep it on?

MARTIN: I don't even know if things are headed that way! But... I don't want to be unprepared.

DOUGLAS: Oh, Martin. Surely you don’t mean you’re—

MARTIN: What? No! Not that it’s any of your business, but I do have my petanque team.

DOUGLAS: And now it's well and truly a bobsled. Well, fear not, Martin! You've come to the right man for pointers.

MARTIN: Oh, God, no!

DOUGLAS: We will see your sled cross that finish line, fully loaded, hopefully not first, and with no parties injured or grievously disappointed!

MARTIN: Ahhhhhhh, Douglas, will you please stop talking about my ruddy bobsled!?

(The door to the flight deck opens and closes.)

CAROLYN: What nonsense is this?

MARTIN: Douglas is asking very invasive questions!

DOUGLAS: About his overnight trip with Theresa.

CAROLYN: Why, Douglas! Are you so hard up these days that you’re keen on living through Martin, of all people?

DOUGLAS: Hardly. It's something like watching a nature program-- it's not your cup of tea exactly, but you find yourself curious how they get up to it anyhow.