31 Plays in 31 Days, #11 - “Respects to Pay”

[breakinglight11]

MORE FAN FIC. Been feeling kind of guilty for how much time I’ve devoted to it compared to original wok this August. But when I posted the final chapter of The Favor, which this challenge helped me finish, it got over three hundred hits on its first day across AO3 and FF.Net. So I kind of can’t kick the habit when it means the stuff I’m writing actually gets read by more than a handful of people. Sigh.

This piece immediately follows Day #9 - Receiving Line, inspired by a moment in The Favor where a moment at Peggy’s funeral is mentioned. I thought I could relatively quickly dramatize the event, so I jumped in. As a matter of fact, this drafting tactic of writing a conversational moment as if it were dialogue in a play just to get the shape of it down is really effective for me. Maybe it’s because I’m better at drama than prose. But I was having trouble figuring out the order of ideas, what should be spoken when, and switching to dialogue only made it way easier. That’s a helpful trick to discover.

Of course, I have to make sure I commit to really editing the piece when it comes to converting it to prose. Can’t just slap some narration in around it and call it a day; it has to be shaped to the purpose. It’s too easy to dash it off. As this currently stands, it has a good arc, but perhaps it moves too fast. They move from emotional point to emotional point a little too quickly and easily. But that’s a common problem in these 31P31D scenes where I’m pushing to get them finished. In the prose edit I’ll have to see if it needs more, or if the narration can serve to soften the transitions. 

Day #11 - “Respects to Pay”
From Forever Captain
By Phoebe Roberts
~~~

GRANT CARTER, Peggy’s WWII-veteran widower, 109
STEVE ROGERS, Captain America, 32

New York, 2016
~~~

(GRANT returns to his seat, while STEVE uncomfortably remains standing, having trouble meeting GRANT’s eyes.)

GRANT: Thank you for coming.

STEVE: Of course… Mr. Carter, isn’t it? Like her.

GRANT: It is hers, actually. I took her name.

STEVE: Oh.

(Pause.)

STEVE: I had to come. I couldn’t not.

GRANT: It’s good of you. It would have meant a lot to her.

(Pause.)

STEVE: Yeah. I… I’m so sorry for your loss.

GRANT: Thank you. And I’m sorry for yours.

STEVE: I— I beg your pardon?

GRANT: I know what she meant to you. This is a loss for you too.

STEVE: It’s— that’s kind of you. I know— I know it’s not the same—

GRANT: No. In a lot of ways, it’s worse.

STEVE: I’m sorry?

GRANT: I had her for sixty years. A whole life. That got taken away from you. You’re in a much worse place.

STEVE: Sir, I didn’t mean to make this your burden. I don’t want to intrude…

GRANT: I knew the woman that she was. How could I fault you for loving her?

(STEVE struggles with it and breaks down.)

STEVE: I did, I… I do. I know I’m not supposed to anymore. But I couldn’t help it.

GRANT: Believe me, son. I get it.

STEVE: This feels wrong. Putting all this on you now.

GRANT: Kid… I buried the love of my life today too. I am the only one who knows what you’re going through. There’s nobody else you could put it on.

(The last of STEVE’s reserve collapses.)

STEVE: Everybody talks like… I lost her a long time ago. Like I should have moved past it by now. I know it’s crazy… I know it was crazy to want. But… she was everything, once, and then… she was all I had. She was the person I turned to when I didn’t know what to do. Now where am I supposed to turn?

GRANT: Yeah. I know what you mean.

(STEVE tries to reign himself back in.)

STEVE: Forgive me if I’ve— crossed a line. But she was very important to me. Without her… I don’t know what I’m going to do.

GRANT: Son, she loved you all her life. She never stopped for a moment.

STEVE: Sir— you don’t have to do this—

GRANT: It’s the truth. I can’t tell you what she’d want you to do. But I know that she loved you and believed in you. And if she did, you should too.

STEVE: Mr. Carter… I don’t know what to say.

GRANT: You don’t have to say anything. It’s all right, I promise.

STEVE: Is it?

GRANT: A pal of mine told me he tried to be what he needed once. Just… paying it forward.