breakinglight11: (Crawling Dromio)
[personal profile] breakinglight11
Mixed bag here, some good and some bad. First, the good:

- It's official, I'm going to become a direct employee at Integralis rather than a contractor from an agency. Not sure when it's going to happen, but the process has been started. My rep is going to try to get me a pay increase, which would be really nice, but it's not like I'm going anywhere if it doesn't happen.

- I actually think I'm losing weight, which pleases me. I tried on some clothes that had started to fit like sausage casings and they were a lot more comfortable. My thighs are still too big and I'm still softer in the middle than I have been in years, but I am seeing results while still feeling good about my eating, so using the calorie counter has been working.

- Today I am going to upgrade my phone. I've had an iPhone 2 I think for about two years now and it's showing it age, running slow and blowing up constantly. I'm going to cash in my upgrade and get the new one.

Now the bad:

- Still haven't decided what my next project will be, because this week was an endless parade of expensive, pain-in-the-ass chores that all took longer than they should have. Had to pay to get my car fixed, chase down some undelivered packages, take the HTP props and costumes back to club storage, pick up new scrips for both Jared and me, pay a parking ticket and two hospital bills, and run all over creation trying to get the immunization hold lifted off my Lesley file so I can fucking register for classes. Some of that stuff is still not quite resolved, and I'm still stressing over getting it all done rather than trying to start something new and productive.

- Got back my final packet for the semester with my teacher's comments. My one-act is pretty much a mess, which is discouraging. I never loved it and only wrote it because I had to, but still, I didn't think it was as flawed as all that. And I have no fucking clue how to fix it. For a variety of reasons, I am not feeling particularly good about my work right now, so now I'm stuck between wanting to generate more theatrical writing to redeem myself and never wanting to look at that shit again.

- I want to act again, or direct somewhere other than of out Hold Thy Peace's pity, but nobody will fucking cast me or pick me for it. I don't know what I'm not doing right. I hear other auditions that I don't think are as good as mine, and yet I never get cast. And the directing resumes I send out never come back. I guess I'm not as good as I thought I was, and I'm getting fed up with trying and never getting anywhere.

Date: 2011-11-18 05:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] in-water-writ.livejournal.com
Theater at First is holding auditions for Pride and Prejudice just after Thanksgiving, if you're interested...

http://www.theatreatfirst.org/shows/pride_prejudice/pride_prejudice.shtml

Date: 2011-11-18 05:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] breakinglight11.livejournal.com
Yeah, Jared and I are both signed up. I have a feeling he'll get something and I won't, but apparently I like being disappointed.

Date: 2011-11-18 05:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] in-water-writ.livejournal.com
I'm signed up as well, so perhaps we can be disappointed together.
When are your audition times?

Date: 2011-11-18 05:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] breakinglight11.livejournal.com
Jared's at 8 on the 28th, I'm at 9. *hugs* I'd rather you not be disappointed at all, but still, can't think of anyone better to do anything with. Did you see my message about dinner Saturday?

Date: 2011-11-18 08:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] in-water-writ.livejournal.com
I'd rather YOU not be disappointed too :)
Yes! I've been forgetting to get back to you, because I'm a prat. John and I will be there! Shall we bring anything?

Date: 2011-11-18 09:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] breakinglight11.livejournal.com
Oh, yay! Drinks of some kind would great!

Date: 2011-11-18 07:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lightgamer.livejournal.com
As someone who has thoroughly enjoyed everything you've directed, including the stuff you wrote yourself, I really don't think that HTP lets you direct out of pity. You are damn good at what you do, and Hold Thy Peace knows that, and they are lucky to have you.

Having heard more than my fair share of acting woes from my sweet sister, I don't think talent has anything to do with it. It's all about connections. Community theater is supposed to circumvent all that nonsense, but I really believe that it's difficult to get any theater group to trust you with an acting or especially directing role when they don't know you personally.

HTP knows you, and even after you've graduated they continue to furnish considerable time, money, and effort on projects you direct - because they KNOW how good you are.

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